Unorganised, disorganised, heterodox or individual beliefs, ideas and praxis sharing.
5 posts • Page 1 of 1
Hello, im ignis,i will try to describe my.. view..
Being raised in a christian family, i was discouraged from looking into any beliefs that weren't the main ones. AKA any pagan or occult beliefs. this only encouraged me to do so. i looked back and saw the slaughter that Christians had done in the past and how the can still act now, and realized its a very one sided self riotous belief. (from my experiences, i have meet okay Christians. i should also say i'm throwing other beliefs derived off of the idea of Jesus, Mary, god, Joseph ect in one basket i'm wrongfully just labeling as Christianity.)
I have had experiences in astral projection, and sleep paralysis shadow people encounters. So this is one of the foundations of my beliefs, simply because i know it, and felt it. i plan to learn more to,i know there is more and i am eager to learn.
I believe i'm an old soul, acting mature at a young age, and finding comfort in the company of an older audience, and constantly feeling tired, seeing the world as a shit hole, and in general not wanting to live through this torture. ( i set in place a rule to not take my own life, and to prevent the loss of my life if at all possible)
So all that was all some general info. random points that we're poorly coordinated. but from that all, i want to make this point of my belief, and personal experience of spirituality:
There is something, something magical. There has to be, because if not, This world...This world will shred my sanity.. or.. make me brake my rule, witch i have held to and plan to.
I don't think i hit this on the head or not, its hard to communicate something like this, but this is the basics of my.. beliefs.
So basically you're desperate and are willing to accept anything as long as it isn't reality.
You should probably try and resolve that before you start messing around with the occult.
There are some atheist support groups that you can talk to and if you're still in school there might be some free counselors around.
Sounds like the Occult has found you to a degree!
I think this is a realistic starting point for you, or anyone.
Only half of the world is a shit hole, it's good to be aware of this,
but maybe try to focus more on the better half!
Since no thing defines It's own creation. It cannot be held responsible for it's nature; then there are choices.
When reason becomes obsolete, and you are going in circles. Consider it progress.
The Tree Of Life - Ten layers of Cosmic anabolism. Before that there was Energy. Before that, Nothing. Something can come from nothing. This is all just one beat, in the rhythm of a Song. That plays forever.
Yea, I can't deny I probably have some sort of depression, but I never act on it, I see the bad and the good, but to me personally the bad pulls my attention more than the good.
I believe in a sort of karma, so that keeps me from doing anything stupid. But I will say I'm not desperate to believe in anything but reality, I need something I can experience to believe it, hints my trust in astral projection. (Witch I view as the soul leaving to who knows where In other dimensions)
Thank you for the warm greeting ^^"
It sounds like the magic is calling you
I think you should pursue your interests and lead a fulfilled and happy life! If you are thinking of becoming a magician, I cannot stress enough learning a comprehensive system of energy work to provide discipline and a sensible foundation for your travels beyond mundane reality. Yoga, meditation, qi gong, Hermetics, one of the many Golden Dawn-style ceremonial paths etc. Pick one that calls to you and start practicing. Keep a magical journal of your progress. Leftover blockages from your oppressive religious upbringing may surface during your initial training, so I second Des' recommendation to find a support group if needed. Franz Bardon's soul mirror exercises may help here too.
And most definitely work on developing a sustainable treatment plan for your depression. If it is mild to moderate, daily exercise, sunlight and a balanced diet and sleep schedule can help a lot. For more severe forms, psychotherapy or psychiatry may be needed. Occult practice can either help to heal mental illnesses or exacerbate them, and it all depends on your level of awareness and control.
"Follow the path of the radiant life force as she flashes upward like lightning through your body." - Vijanabhairava Tantra
5 posts • Page 1 of 1
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