Wounded Healer

[Occult Forum Archive]

Original post: Horus

I am writing this post first and foremost to get feedback, so I invite all opinions both positive and negative to share their thoughts. Before I explain I would also like to say that perhaps this post is written as a bit of justification, though I do it in earnest because I feel that there is nothing wrong with taking a positive perspective toward ones negative aspects... for how are we to work through them if not by getting above them?

I have noticed a big trend with depression and other dis-ease among occultists. It is common for many people to consider the attraction of those of us who suffer from some dis-ease to the occult to be merely one acting on escapist tendency... that I cannot deny, but historically it is not uncommon for a holy person to come upon The (A) Way as perhaps an escape from whatever it is they might be running from anyway (example: Milarepa)... so perhaps, though it may not be ideal, coming to the occult for such reasons is not necessarily "bad". But I also feel that perhaps there is a different aspect of this... perhaps some unconcious insight that one may find true healing via their investigations into the mind and soul.

I have always had this feeling toward things which alter and deconstruct ones conciousness. One cannot deny the effect the LSD era had on spirituality and healing. With my own experimentations with drugs in Highschool I always felt somewhat different from the people who just wanted to "party" and "get f***ed up!," though again, I won't deny a certain escapist tendency even with that. But I always felt compelled to experiment, not that I may forget the things pressing on me in daily life, but that I may gain insight into how "I" work. I wanted to correct things. This of course carried over into my exploration of the occult, first via attempts to correct things outside of me, later turning more inward.

I can understand fully the urgency with which many would steer away those who by certain standards would be considered in dis-ease, and I myself would caution such from certain Theurgic and higher practices (until their issues are resolved), could it be in being so quick to discourage those away fromt he occult, that we are unknowingly leading such individuals away from a chance (perhaps their only chance) to heal? It also seems that much of this stems from the emphasis Western [and now pretty much any Modern] culture has on dis-ease. Once upon a time, it was not uncommon for an upcoming Healer to experience a type of sickness - either physical, mental, emotion, or a combination - as his "initiation". I have also heard many accounts of Holy Craziness, and other such afflictions which one might have prior to and even sometimes after becoming a Holy Person.

Now I am not advocating that those of us suffering from depression or worse go out and commit ourselves to the Great Work in hopes to heal, nor that simply doing a few spells on yourself will get rid of whatever ailment one might be suffering from. But I do feel however that in some (I won't say all) cases the attraction of one with such ailments to the occult is no mistake. There must definately be an emphasis on the healing aspects in your studies, particularly with Modern Western occultism, where there is a de-emphasis on healing and the wounded healer. Perhaps the high degree of failure associated with these cases stems not from being an unworthy student because of ones issues, but because of a misleading assumption by said person that ascention will automatically bring healing with it. In most cases it will not... and neither will come about. But many of the techniques and insights one might gain through occult studies is quite applicable to their own healing. Again, there must be an emphasis on healing... and I feel there must also be an understanding of the dangers which one may encounter, there must also be an understanding that the process of healing (through increased knowledge of ones "self" and certain practices) is not always pleasant, and in many cases WILL NOT BE.

Well these are my thoughts. I'm sure many will disagree, but I felt really compelled to post this anyway in spite of possible criticism... thoughts?

[Occult Forum Archive]

Original post: Jendayi

Horus

I hear what you are saying. In ways, I agree that people suffering from depression could be drawn to the occult. But I think we need to look a little deeper into this to find the real reason for this. If you look at these people, they are, in many cases, the ones who have been through the hard life experiences. It is only natural that people go to religion to figure out what 'went wrong' and to find higher meaning for the difficult things that happen. On another note, the people who are drawn to the occult specifically are the ones who have these 'gifts' that they just don't understand. In themselves, they may not consider them evil but if you go by popular opinion, they are. (I don't know about your country but I live in Canada and we are mostly Christian and Jewish, especially as you go further north.) So, being told that they are evil will cause depression as well as not understanding why they are different. So they separate themselves from society, feeling they don't belong. This leads them to brooding on their thoughts and adds to the depression. Eventually the thought occurs..."are there others out there like me?" So they start their search...the first stop is usually the ones considered 'weirdoes' like us occultists. You can't feel so weird if so many people think the same.

Another theory on this, as one of my good friends brought up, is that sometimes gifts add to the problem of depression but suppressing it can be worse. Gifts can help as well as hinder. So, if we go back to the same scenario as before using this new information it helps to understand why people with gifts could be more prone to the depression. For example, if someone is not accepted by society because they are weird (gifted) then the most likely reaction at first would be to suppress it which causes more problems than good (who wants to be seen as the odd ball in town?). People are social creatures and as such, we need a sense of community to keep us feeling whole. I don't know if I can believe that people actually choose this path because it is a very difficult one. Well I guess there are the fluff bunnies that skim the top so they can assume the mysteries and look 'cool' like in the movies. But mind you, they never were interested in the occult, really, in the first place nor would I call them practitioners of anything but illusion.

Hmm... so any comments on all of that?

Jendayi

[Occult Forum Archive]

Original post: Aether Manas

This post reminded me very much of a description of the astrological significance of the Centaur Chiron, in a book called New Magicks for a New Age. I'm sorry to say that I can't find this book anymore, but the main idea presented was that Chiron was a centuar gifted in the arts of medicine and healing -- yet was mortally wounded. A good number of parallels were mentioned, such as the nature of shamanistic initiation, and the mythos of Odin. The book went on to say that wisdom usually comes with a price, that in order to learn the nooks and crannies of one thing, a person must at some point imerse themselves in it's polar opprosite.

I wish I could find that book....

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Original post: Ludi

I had my entire sense of myself torn up and reformed during an illness and were it not for that experience, I would not be open to the possibilities of the occult.

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Original post: Mystikiwi

Once again, a brilliant post from Jendayi.

I felt a lot better just by reading it - and I mean really better - mentally, physically and maybe "spiritually" too.

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Original post: Fiend

as a hollistic healer, there is a saying, "As a Doctor You wouldnt just try to cure the symptoms of the disease you would also cure the Cause so why would ytou try to cure the body without curing the Spiritual as well?" after all if u only cure one the illness will come back.

[Occult Forum Archive]

Original post: Jendayi

Thanks, again, Mystikiwi...that makes me feel good.:-D

Jendayi