feeling a bit down

[Mutate]

This time 2 years ago I was on top of the world, I was confident and making things happen. I'd go out of the house and decide that I wanted a pretty woman chatting to me, and there'd be on at the shop friendly. I went to the beach with 2 friends and I just knew days before there'd be a pretty blonde woman who would make friends with me, and it happened just as i foresaw. I went along to see friends in london and I met a beautiful woman, who wanted to date me and live with me. I felt like all my power had given me everything I wanted. I didnt know about magick or "the secret" at that time, I just knew i could push my mind to make things happen when really driven.

That was 18 months ago, I have just broken up with her after a long and unhappy relationship, she was a bit crazy and not right for me. I feel down and lonely, and with no power at all. I can't get a job, even a good volunteer job (though i cant make myself try very hard), I went to a monthly Pagan/wicca meetup and a political activist meetup in my hometown in the month, they were good but the rest of the weeks i been bored and so down. I have good friends, but want something else in my life. I did a tarot reading about my break up and kept getting the devil and 8 of swords (bound and frustrated) over and over, and when asking how to move on, the page of pentacles. (?)

anyway, i just wanted to vent and get it out, thanks.

[FIRE-MAIDEN]

life hits hard at times my friend, and when it does its natural to feel this way, but i can assure you, you will rise again , over the head of every personal joy, lies the damocletian sword, of pain, ready to crush the unwary...
the soul can indeed be lulled into sweet forgetfullness and security, but the unfortified soul , can be torn to sheds, if it does not acknowledge certain signs !
its rather like the devotee who feels theyve found the perfect religion, philosophy, but the idealistic statue, apon which theyve been devoted, is shattered into fragments at their feet, but through this painful realisation, comes a new awareness, and a total rebirth, in rebirth, their are no sign posts, at least not ones we recognise at first, but be assured you shall rise strongly again.
you have proved to yourself, you can make things happen, its a case, of refuseing to be defeated, tuneing into that god-self power again and makeing thy own reality ,channeling power into the desire until the gloomy shadows, are driven away, and your soul taste success again.
i have always said relationships are the greatest karma of all , matters of the heart hurt the most, but this female was not worthy of you, so look to your future for one that is, and do not accept less then being true to yourself !

[Darkest-Messiah]

Vent...pity parties are notoriously fun - as long as we move forward