Recently awakened individual, grew up in an occult practicing family without knowing. Went home, and seemed like they were feeding of energy, in turn I hit back. Spent a few weeks in bed, with insomnia, fear, terror, thought about suiciding during one of the nights, it was one month almost without sleep. I avoided eating anything cooked by the aunt or mother since it made me feel not too good. At some point I could not take it anymore, so I asked my mom to help me, she cooked food for me and I was not sure if I should eat it or not, but a voice in my head said it is fine and that I should eat. ( The ill feelings include depressive mood and a sense that I cannot breathe in air fully). While eating I started baling better , energetic( as natural to me ), I could feel the "airs" coming back, my torso expanding, my chest getting fuller. She asked my ... why did you eat now .. after refusing so many previous times ?? ( she seemed really curious) I replied that a voice inside my head said so . Than she told me to be good and not do what I did again ( .. I was hitting back, instinctively I knew what I had to do ... to get the energy, "the airs"), I said I will still do that sometimes because it might come in handy sometimes. Then it happened again ... , so my thought is that my mother did something but I do not know what ...
After this "awakening" I could feel a lot of hostility from inside my family towards me .... which I fought .. and won .. till they all ganged up on me ..
My story might not be to coherent but .. some of you might understand and explain what happened, .... what are they doing or using against me ... and how can I get the pressure of my chest ...
Thank you in advance ....
You sound like you're suffering some kind of psychotic episode, possibly combined with symptoms of anxiety. Please seek help from a mental health professional.
"The path of the Sage is called
'The Path of Illumination'
he who gives himself to this path
is like a block of wood
that gives itself to the chisel-
cut by cut it is honed to perfection"
- DDJ, Verse 27
"It's still magic even if you know how it's done." - Terry Pratchett
This is a checklist that Dion Fortune put together.
First: Go and see a doctor. Do a routine check up. Tell them that you sometimes feel a pressure in your chest. They know what tests to be done.
Secondly: Go and see a psychiatrist. There seem to be some issues in your family that you should try and resolve first.
Obviously it does sound like you are paranoid and the breathing problem can be an anxiety attack.
But, I would recommend seeing a trained professional at least 3 times.
Is there anyway to get out of the house in a sane and calm fashion?
Any friend or other relative that you can stay with for a short time?
It's important in these matters that you don't isolate yourself or that you run off into the countryside. It's probably best to stay in a city.
You are doing something good by talking to us. Please don't forget to talk to your friends as well.
You don't have to tell them everything, just tell them that you feel some strain in your relationship with you mother and aunt. Tell them that it feels like they are draining all your energy and you don't know what to do.
NOW. After this, if you have been given medication for the pressure, medication for your anxiety and are still feeling like you are under attack. Please come back to the forum and we will help you further.
My usual suggestion is to do some basic uncrossing/cleansing work -- even if it doesn't cure the problem you should see improvement within a short time of having done the working, which will back up that it's of supernatural origin. If no changes occur, then the problem is based somewhere else. Just taking a 13 Herb Bath or even a simple bath of a handful of salt and/or baking soda in the water will usually make a mark. If you do this and see improvement even temporarily after the work, then it suggests occult phenomenon is the cause of your trouble, and stronger actions may need to be taken. If it doesn't make an improvement, investigate other causes -- as another suggested, see a doctor or psychologist in that case.
chiarokumaruti wrote:Recently awakened individual, grew up in an occult practicing family without knowing. Went home, and seemed like they were feeding of energy, in turn I hit back. Spent a few weeks in bed, with insomnia, fear, terror, thought about suiciding during one of the nights, it was one month almost without sleep. I avoided eating anything cooked by the aunt or mother since it made me feel not too good. At some point I could not take it anymore, so I asked my mom to help me, she cooked food for me and I was not sure if I should eat it or not, but a voice in my head said it is fine and that I should eat. ( The ill feelings include depressive mood and a sense that I cannot breathe in air fully). While eating I started baling better , energetic( as natural to me ), I could feel the "airs" coming back, my torso expanding, my chest getting fuller. She asked my ... why did you eat now .. after refusing so many previous times ?? ( she seemed really curious) I replied that a voice inside my head said so . Than she told me to be good and not do what I did again ( .. I was hitting back, instinctively I knew what I had to do ... to get the energy, "the airs"), I said I will still do that sometimes because it might come in handy sometimes. Then it happened again ... , so my thought is that my mother did something but I do not know what ...
After this "awakening" I could feel a lot of hostility from inside my family towards me .... which I fought .. and won .. till they all ganged up on me ..
My story might not be to coherent but .. some of you might understand and explain what happened, .... what are they doing or using against me ... and how can I get the pressure of my chest ...
Thank you in advance ....
It can be so much fun coming from a Talented family. Especially with a skilled kitchen witch.
It's quite the story you wrote above. The other members here were simply being responsible in suggesting a medical evaluation. It's actually a rather common first rec. I've come across this before in Gifted families. Hell, my soon to be mother in law even made a special dish 'just for me' for the Christmas Dinner party.
It sounds like if you can figure out what the underlying hostility is about that you may have a chance of rectifying things with your family. I've heard of Gifted families using magic as a training tool and for punishments and stuff. It happens. It's not something you come across often.
Rin wrote:You sound like you're suffering some kind of psychotic episode, possibly combined with symptoms of anxiety. Please seek help from a mental health professional.
Please listen to Rin. What you just described was a paranoid psychotic episode. I've had plenty, being schizophrenic myself.
Just like with anything, there are good and bad psychotherapists and doctors. I wouldn't be to hasty to recommend either, especially if one doesn't have some form of payment insurance. Not only that, but many medications given for pyschiatric treatment can be as dangerous as any drug on the market, especially when considering that each person is idiosyncratic when it comes to drugs of all kinds, but especially pysychotropic drugs. Also, when having possible mental problems, asking trusted friends their opinion about your behavior and what you claim. If it really is "occult attacks".....which can easily happen since peoples' minds and moods change frequently, and, if a person has a storngly placed NEPTUNE or planets in PISCES, can easily be vulnerable to negative thoughts and feelings, even when not directed at him or her. I would suggest some time in the country....going for walks in nature, each day for a couple hours a day, can help a disturbed person to attain equilibrium.
BOTH situations MAY be happening, that you are having some "exagerated mental or emotional responses" to either normal family attitudes and behavior, or you may be completely imagining what they are doing to you, or that you are unbalanced and vulnerable, and that they may be doing "occult" or hidden things against you, or a combination of any of the foregoing. Like other members here have pointed out, the 1st thing to do is determine if you are IMAGINING an "occult" attack, or are hyper-sensitive at this point in time and just feeling normal family activity, but making exagerated responses to it. That's why you need some outside opinion by those whom you trust to tell you the truth, by observing you AND other family members, while you are with your family, etc....especially if the trusted person has "occult awareness".
One last comment re: psychotherapy: and that is that the whole issue of "occultism" in general, is regarded by most practicing pschiatrists and psycholgists as a symptom of mental pathology or sickness......so, take caution.
If there really are "occult attacks" by members of ones family, it indicates some very serious psychological problems, that would say to me: Get the hell out of there if you have the means to.
I would like to know how old you are, please? And if you are living with other members of your family.
Mind-Kontrol and Drugs are the LAW, drugs under CIA MK-ULTRA
That if you can, find another place to stay with someone you trust, at least for awhile until you can sort out what the hell is going on with your perception that your own family would want to direct an "occult" attack agaisnt you. Also, make your own food if you are still "worried" that it may contain some kind of hidden psychic energy directed against you, and see if that helps you. BUT, even if it works, it does NOT necessarily mean that you're under an "occult attack" by your family, you may ONLY be imagining or exagerating what you perceive. You need outside advice by a good, sympathetic to the occult, and knowledgable therapist of some kind to help you determine the truth of your perceptions.
DO NOT, by any means, drink any alcohol or take any type of mind-altering drug at this time, unless they are medications prescribed by a competent doctor. BUT, keep in mind that even prescription drugs can, and do, CREATE much more dramatic mental or emotional problems than they are purported to cure, especially the classes of drugs under the PROZAC family, and the BENZODIAZAPINES, like VALIUM. In this day and age, many psycho-therapeutic drugs, so-called, are way over-prescribed, even to very young children. There is a TON of money to be made within the "psychotherapeutic" community, especially involving drugs.
IF, there is real truth to your family or members of it directing an occult attack against you: then there are things you can do to protect yourself, as someone on this thread has suggested. Dion Fortune wrote a book on it, and it can be found for FREE download on SCRIBD.COM, which you can also JOIN for FREE.
Mind-Kontrol and Drugs are the LAW, drugs under CIA MK-ULTRA
occult attack , advice
, so my thought is that my mother did something but I do not know what ... 
