schizophrenia vs possible possession

[johnathanrs]

How does one distinguish the difference between the two?

[Desecrated]

Schizophrenia = Patient is experience hallucinations.
Possession = Patient is climbing on the celling.

[Nahemah]

Schizophrenia = Patient is experience hallucinations.
Possession = Patient is climbing on the celling.

That is the best short description ever.

I am sceptical about spirit possession in the Abrahamic sense, as it was used to explain away and scapegoat illnesses like epilepsy and other convulsive conditons, mental illness and abuses of the mind and body. The church held back medical science for quite some time, in the west, because of it.

I do accept spiritual overlays and 'horsing', divine riding and so on, willing participation events, but they are not the same beast, colloquially speaking.

(I do of course understand that other people view this differently, I am just giving my own thoughts on it, not directing orders. [thumbup] )

[johnathanrs]

Schizophrenia = Patient is experience hallucinations.
Possession = Patient is climbing on the celling.

Number 1 = Schizophrenia
Number 2 = Possession (Also experiences hallucinations.)

So you are saying that there isn't a metamorphosis for possession? There's no becoming possessed. No 1.1 - 1.9 only Number 1 or 2? Is this propaganda or are you accounting from your own experiences/sourcing someone else? Can you provide a reference to the source if it is the latter. I want to know more about this.

[Desecrated]

Schizophrenia = Patient is experience hallucinations.
Possession = Patient is climbing on the celling.

Number 1 = Schizophrenia
Number 2 = Possession (Also experiences hallucinations.)

So you are saying that there isn't a metamorphosis for possession? There's no becoming possessed. No 1.1 - 1.9 only Number 1 or 2? Is this propaganda or are you accounting from your own experiences/sourcing someone else? Can you provide a reference to the source if it is the latter. I want to know more about this.

As an ordained minister I follow the guidelines of the catholic church. Possession is extremely rare and only happens to those of immense spiritual faith.

But there has been a change in recent year with possession being more and more popular in America and also some European countries.

The catalyst for this was the 2005 movie 'The Exorcism of Emily Rose'. This movie pitted science and modern psychology against christianity. And with the rising anti-vaccine crowd this thinking for some reason took hold. Now every evangelic christian with the flu thinks that they are possessed.

There is also a rising movement in america that disapproves of hauntings and ghosts, and tries to label everything paranormal as demonic influence. This has been extremely popular in several ghost hunting shows on tv.

There is however some belief in the new age crowd that the origin of mental issues can be demons or negative thought-forms discussing themselves as demon (if you don't like the christian approach but still don't like science)

There is also the church of Scientology, who for some reason declared war on psychology but still needed an explanation for mental illness. In their view it's some sort of evil alien soul.

Now, the more interesting question is of course, how would you recognize if somebody was possessed or just batshit insane?
Well, traditionally, demons can't stand the word of Christ, and having the person recite prayer or the declaration of faith is an easy way to find out.
Other things like touching the cross, holy water or holy oil can be used to see if the person reacts to that.
A third evidence is the presence of supernatural. Can the possessed person manifest objects? Most famously was a girl who started puking nails. Can they fly around, climb the walls, move objects by their mind or have information that nobody could have available. The Exorcist movie was prominent in making this phenomenon famous.

A good exorcist will of course use tap water and tell the person that it is holy water, if the person reacts to the fake water, they are faking it, if the person knows that it is fake, the investigation continues. And there are other tricks as well.

Oddly enough, the wikipedia article is incredible factual and consist most information you would need for a deeper study about the actual exorcisms performed by the church.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Exorcism_ ... lic_Church

[johnathanrs]

Okay, I got you. So you are saying their is no metamorphsis that happens. People who are at the what you deem as possessed stage are not lost at that point? They are still becoming evil and when you save them, they are returned to normal?

May I ask minister, if you do not mind me doing so, as this avenue of communication is a bit strange for us, but I am experiencing slightly the third phase of experiencing supernatural with other symptoms that are heavily the blueprint of schizophrenia. Is there any advise on how to overcome this using modern remedies? Do you need any information?

As an ordained minister I follow the guidelines of the catholic church. Possession is extremely rare and only happens to those of immense spiritual faith.

My religious viewpoint: I respect all religions and try to see goodness in them. I would call myself highly spiritual, but realize that this may be ego on my part, as how does one discern if they are truly spiritual or not? Be as it may, I align myself with buddhism the closest and if I were to choose one, I would go with that. However, I am familiar with almost every religion out there from Luciferism to the cult of osiris. However, I am only a laymen and lack a highly technical understanding of most religions. I try my best to understand basic overviews on how each work piecing them together like a puzzle. Thank you for your time.

[corvidus]

Very interesting stuff, Desecrated. Thanks for the informative reply!

A good exorcist will of course use tap water and tell the person that it is holy water, if the person reacts to the fake water, they are faking it, if the person knows that it is fake, the investigation continues. And there are other tricks as well.

Oddly enough, the wikipedia article is incredible factual and consist most information you would need for a deeper study about the actual exorcisms performed by the church.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Exorcism_ ... lic_Church

[Desecrated]

Okay, I got you. So you are saying their is no metamorphsis that happens. People who are at the what you deem as possessed stage are not lost at that point? They are still becoming evil and when you save them, they are returned to normal?

If you stare into the abyss for to long it will change who you are. If somebody was possesed for years, their behavior would not be "normal" even after being cured.

May I ask minister, if you do not mind me doing so, as this avenue of communication is a bit strange for us, but I am experiencing slightly the third phase of experiencing supernatural with other symptoms that are heavily the blueprint of schizophrenia. Is there any advise on how to overcome this using modern remedies? Do you need any information?

Have you been to a doctor?
Are you on any prescription pills?
Are you experience paranormal phenomenon, or are people around you experiencing them?
Have you been to the church?
Why do you think it something more then mental diseases?

My religious viewpoint: I respect all religions and try to see goodness in them. I would call myself highly spiritual, but realize that this may be ego on my part, as how does one discern if they are truly spiritual or not? Be as it may, I align myself with buddhism the closest and if I were to choose one, I would go with that. However, I am familiar with almost every religion out there from Luciferism to the cult of osiris. However, I am only a laymen and lack a highly technical understanding of most religions. I try my best to understand basic overviews on how each work piecing them together like a puzzle. Thank you for your time.

Monks and nuns that are deeply devoted to the christian faith but can't let go of their past or can't accept the inner demons we all carry sometimes manifest these negative experiences as demons. We are talking about pious people who think they deserve the wrath of god or punishment for their sins.
In their mind there can not be both Salvation and Sin at the same time, so for them to accept jesus into their life, they have to remove all elements of evil in themselves and this is a lengthy process.

If your not part of the cloak the possibility of demonic possession is extremely slim. Why would a a demon try to convert an agnostic when there are priests and nuns that would be a much better insult to god.

Plus,we really don't need demons in this world to turn us away from Jesus.

[Haelos]

Not trying to poke any holes, just stating some commonly known facts:

When a demon (or any spiritual entity, for that matter) possesses a human, it takes on all of the karmic debt associated with the soul of that person. Also, if they stay in a human body long enough, they *become* human.

You will *never* walk past someone on the street who is possessed by a demon. You'll just walk past a very scary, oftentimes violent human. Nothing more.


Spiritual possession is relatively instant as well. The longest part of the process would be the entity taking you over, which would only take a long time if your mind was actively awake.
For most people, their mind is in a constant state of slight hypnosis, completely or mostly unaware of what's around or within them, perfectly susceptible to all magick.


Also, Christianity has nothing to do with Demonic possession. There are plenty of negative entities in almost every tradition, and many, many of them seem to be keen on body hopping. Your faith also has nothing to do with it.

If you are an entity who's sole purpose of existing is to serve evil more powerful than you, or it's to promote negativity in any way, it doesn't matter what human you grab on to to do the job, as long as it gets done.


Also, the reason Demons respect the Word of God is because they also serve god, and are fearful of Him.

No entity can break/take your freewill; However, if you aren't using your freewill, it technically doesn't exist.
This means that you need to strive to live every moment actively, with your full attention. They can only take control of you when your awareness falters.


Finally, almost every single human on this planet is possessed. But not by demons; By their own negative emotions and thoughtforms. No emotional feeling you have comes from within you, except happiness. All other emotions come from outside stimuli, and are to be transmuted and shut out.


Hope this offered some guidance for further study on the matter.

[johnathanrs]

May I ask minister, if you do not mind me doing so, as this avenue of communication is a bit strange for us, but I am experiencing slightly the third phase of experiencing supernatural with other symptoms that are heavily the blueprint of schizophrenia. Is there any advise on how to overcome this using modern remedies? Do you need any information?

Have you been to a doctor? I have have seen 5 doctors.
Are you on any prescription pills? No.
Are you experience paranormal phenomenon, or are people around you experiencing them? I am by myself. It is just me.
Have you been to the church? No.
Why do you think it something more then mental diseases? Because I want to believe it is a mental disease and the on-sought of insanity, but my heart is telling me it is not. Sometimes, one must believe in the very act of belief itself, regardless of what social deems as conventional.

If your not part of the cloak the possibility of demonic possession is extremely slim. Why would a a demon try to convert an agnostic when there are priests and nuns that would be a much better insult to god.

Plus,we really don't need demons in this world to turn us away from Jesus.

I understand. You are likely correct. I am nobody special as I don't have a high amount of spiritual faith as you say, although I believe that I am spiritual; what I also believe is that one day I can become something better than who I am today. To me, life represents achieving my dream and becoming better, and I would do almost anything to obtain my dream, even giving up my happiness by doing so, but my dream has nothing to do with religion, it is an act for the human species. My brother and sisters who all walk different paths of life.

I do not know what I do believe in and truthfully I have rejected the christian religion as a denomination due to its origin point stemming from Zoroastrian, evolving into judaism, branching into islam and christianity. Like all things that are tied to us, we of sin who represent imperfection, can corrupt anything. Through the lens of distortion however, we can find truth among lies. I never judged one based on their faith, only on their actions and moral codes that represented who they are - there character.

To be honest with you, and I do not mean this in any negative way, as I respect any man regardless of their faith who strife to better themselves, but I do feel that you are biased in believing that your religion is the only faith that matters, and obviously not being a component of it, I do not feel that I can truly receive salvation from someone who perceives their own reality through rose mary glasses and I do not also wish to join in the fray of a witch hunt. Thank you however for taking the time to answer my questions.

[johnathanrs]

Spiritual possession is relatively instant as well. The longest part of the process would be the entity taking you over, which would only take a long time if your mind was actively awake.
For most people, their mind is in a constant state of slight hypnosis, completely or mostly unaware of what's around or within them, perfectly susceptible to all magick.
.

If I list my symptoms, can you tell me if it is within the realm of possibility of possible possession takeover? I recognize the fact that I am going crazy.

1. I am hearing voices.
2. I see distortions in the air like bubbles floating that are oscillating all around me. When I focus on them, I feel a strange sensation that is hard to put into context.
3. I hear a very strong ringing in my head that sounds like a sine wave.
4. I see very bright dots of different colors of light that seem to be connected to shadows.
5. I feel a very physical touch all around me.
6. I feel a oozing on my brain like someone cracked a egg inside my skull and a egg has covered my brain and is squeezing it? This has compounded over time. My brain feels divided.
7. I feel like my central place is being attacked? Like something/someone is trying to push itself in.
8. I have been to the hospital 5 times fearful of my life. When I agreed to not anger the 'voice' the pain/shaking stops and I am told it is a panic attack that I am experiencing from the doctors. Due to this, I have stopped going to medical facilities.
9. It gets extremely strong at night time.
10. I am have extremely strong vivid dreams.
11. At night time when I try to sleep, my ceiling looks like its not real? Hard for me to describe this and put it into words. It looks like its the air is oscillating and I am seeing a very heat like mirage looking effect that you would see in a desert.
12. My body randomly shakes and I have correlated this to the 'voice' wanting to tell me something and wanting my attention.

Only if it is possible of possession here, is there anything that you would recommend to break this connection? Thank you for your time.

[Nahemah]

May I ask how your sleep patterns are?

[johnathanrs]

May I ask how your sleep patterns are?

I haven't timed it, but extremely sporadic. Originally, I required no sleep at all and went 2 days without any sleep like it was nothing. The less I sleep however, the worse it gets, so I have recently forced myself to go to sleep. I would say I sleep in 2-3 intervals a night for about 2 hours before I am forced awoken after receiving a very vivid dream. I google sites like dream meaning and interpretation and have seen a very strong correlation with my dream and what I am perceiving to happen through my fears of possession. As of recently, I have yet to go one night without going without dreaming and truth to be told, wish it would stop.

[Haelos]

Judging from your symptoms, it sounds entirely like you are an "Awakening" human who does not know what to do or how to use these gifts. You have skills from your past lives that are spilling over, and it's too much to handle at once.
Combine that with the way our modern culture treats spirituality and the "paranormal", and it really makes a lot of sense.

This can actually cause insanity, if you let it.
It's also a relatively commonly stated idea that negative entities try to attack those who are awakening spiritually.
99% of the time, they actually do you more good than harm, as these entities give you something to "fight against," and their sole purpose of existing is to help your evolution.

We're all evolving towards the Source. It's just that positive entities are evolving towards the active end (the other realms) and negative entities are evolving into the passive end (or physicality, the physical plane, and realms lower in density.) We all serve a distinct purpose in the scheme of things.

They don't actually possess you to achieve this end, to my knowledge. However, I've been proven wrong before.


My only recommendation for you is to read, learn, and understand everything you can about every single topic you can tolerate to "inhale."
This is the path of the Magi.

Understand yourself and what is happening inside your brain, learn what's coming from outside and block it out permanently, and attempt to better yourself in any and every way you can.


-Source of this information: I also felt like I was going insane and developing a mental disorder when I first started learning what was really out there. I've had some really bad freakouts in my past that would be indistinguishable from a schizophrenic attack. Mind you, at least two of them were drug-induced, I think the relevancy holds.
It took a long time for me to come to terms with what was happening inside me, and outside me as well. It was a very scary, lonely experience. Thankfully, I found a tremendous amount of help in this community. I would have honestly been lost if it weren't for some key members on these boards.

Always post any questions you have, even if they seem ridiculous and stupid. Never worry about what people think of you, and write exactly how you feel.

Good luck in your path, my friend. I wish you well, and know that I will be sending some strength your way. Nothing like this is ever fun, and I commend and respect you for taking the effort to ask about this issue.

[Haelos]

Also, any website that claims to offer you interpretations of your dreams, horoscopes, or otherwise life in general, is absolutely, utterly, and without a doubt, full of the kind of shit you wouldn't even fertilize your garden with.

No one can interpret your dreams except you. People can offer guidance, and nothing more. The symbology that is used on those sites is not only outdated, but also warped by the mindset of a New Age culture, where anyone with a blog can be a Physicist as long as they throw the word "quantum" in front of every big word they use.

To properly interpret your dreams, simply apply what the dreams told you to your waking state. If you brain felt heavy while you were dreaming, it could mean you have an over-active thought process, or it could simply mean that you're getting a good night's sleep. The only way to tell is by applying your own knowledge and interpretation to your life. Understanding symbols helps, for sure. But websites that interpret your dreams for you are not to be trusted.


Just a little fun-fact I felt like sharing. People who read their horoscopes at the start of the day are more likely to experience all the effects of the divination, regardless of whether any of the things actually happen.

I have a hypothesis that *anyone* who reads their horoscopes allows themselves to be influenced by them to a greater extent than what the stars actually possess the capabilities of.

[EEHC]

How does one distinguish the difference between the two?

It's not always easy to distinguish. But I would say that 90-95% of the time there is an underlying metal illness that can explain the hallucinations, oppression and self-harm. The Catholic Chuch these days requires a psychological evaluation before even entertaining the possibility of possession. I think it's important that you rule out any mental health issue first. That implies the consultation with a trained professional.

You can find here some information on how Priests approach this:

http://knowledgenuts.com/2014/01/31/how ... l-illness/

[cyberdemon]

Just a little fun-fact I felt like sharing. People who read their horoscopes at the start of the day are more likely to experience all the effects of the divination, regardless of whether any of the things actually happen.

I have a hypothesis that *anyone* who reads their horoscopes allows themselves to be influenced by them to a greater extent than what the stars actually possess the capabilities of.

Nah. The celestial bodies actually do possess that capability and exert their influence whether you read horoscopes or not. Reversing psychology, you'll end up having far better control of the day, for either case.

(Please don't go off-topic.)

[Desecrated]

I do not know what I do believe in and truthfully I have rejected the christian religion as a denomination due to its origin point stemming from Zoroastrian, evolving into judaism, branching into islam and christianity. Like all things that are tied to us, we of sin who represent imperfection, can corrupt anything. Through the lens of distortion however, we can find truth among lies. I never judged one based on their faith, only on their actions and moral codes that represented who they are - there character.

To be honest with you, and I do not mean this in any negative way, as I respect any man regardless of their faith who strife to better themselves, but I do feel that you are biased in believing that your religion is the only faith that matters, and obviously not being a component of it, I do not feel that I can truly receive salvation from someone who perceives their own reality through rose mary glasses and I do not also wish to join in the fray of a witch hunt. Thank you however for taking the time to answer my questions.

So if you are so sure that you are not a christian. Why do you think you are possessed?
That is like me being a vegan and at the same time thinking that I have food poisoning.

[Desecrated]

If I list my symptoms, can you tell me if it is within the realm of possibility of possible possession takeover? I recognize the fact that I am going crazy.

1. I am hearing voices.
2. I see distortions in the air like bubbles floating that are oscillating all around me. When I focus on them, I feel a strange sensation that is hard to put into context.
3. I hear a very strong ringing in my head that sounds like a sine wave.
4. I see very bright dots of different colors of light that seem to be connected to shadows.
5. I feel a very physical touch all around me.
6. I feel a oozing on my brain like someone cracked a egg inside my skull and a egg has covered my brain and is squeezing it? This has compounded over time. My brain feels divided.
7. I feel like my central place is being attacked? Like something/someone is trying to push itself in.
8. I have been to the hospital 5 times fearful of my life. When I agreed to not anger the 'voice' the pain/shaking stops and I am told it is a panic attack that I am experiencing from the doctors. Due to this, I have stopped going to medical facilities.
9. It gets extremely strong at night time.
10. I am have extremely strong vivid dreams.
11. At night time when I try to sleep, my ceiling looks like its not real? Hard for me to describe this and put it into words. It looks like its the air is oscillating and I am seeing a very heat like mirage looking effect that you would see in a desert.
12. My body randomly shakes and I have correlated this to the 'voice' wanting to tell me something and wanting my attention.

Depersonalization disorder - periods of detachment from self or surrounding which may be experienced as "unreal" (lacking in control of or "outside of" self) while retaining awareness that this is only a feeling and not a reality.

Schizotypal personality disorder (STPD) or schizotypal disorder is a mental disorder characterized by a need for social isolation, anxiety in social situations, odd behavior and thinking, and often unconventional beliefs. People with this disorder feel extreme discomfort with maintaining close relationships with people, so they avoid forming them. Peculiar speech mannerisms and odd modes of dress are also diagnostic signs of this disorder. In some cases, people with STPD may react oddly in conversations, not respond, or talk to themselves.[1] They frequently misinterpret situations as being strange or having unusual meaning for them; paranormal and superstitious beliefs are common. Such people frequently seek medical attention for anxiety or depression instead of their personality disorder.[2] Schizotypal personality disorder occurs in approximately 3% of the general population and is slightly more common in males.[3]


People experiencing a psychotic episode in the context of depression may experience persecutory or self-blaming delusions or hallucinations, while people experiencing a psychotic episode in the context of mania may form grandiose delusions.

[Nahemah]

Have you engaged in any magickal workings or rituals prior to or around the start of these disturbances?

How is your health otherwise?

Are you having any major life issues or problems going on, atm?

I asked about sleep as your symptom list is conversant with certain sleep disorders. This is sometimes something which ramps up when exposed to particular magickal practices, though I don't want to speculate on that without further information.

Undiagnosed epilepsy can present with some of these symptoms too, but again, that is speculation, given I am not a doctor and I don't know enough about you to call a diagnosis.

Have you heard of ASMR?

https://peerj.com/articles/851/

(Don't check out the popular, but new age swamped pseudoscince stuff online, if you want to find out more, look at research work. The study of this phenomenon is in its infancy, so a lot is yet to be discovered on it.)

The egg cracking in your head immediately made me think of this and it's not a sensation that everyone who experiences it enjoys. It can be scary if you don't understand it and mixed with sleep deprivation/ parasomnias it can be overwhelming.

You may simply be confused by extended mental and physical exhaustion and your mind and body are struggling to cope.

A yes or no answer is fine here, details not necessary, but have you experienced any traumatic situations or injuries in the past or recently?

I want to know more about you, if you don't mind, so more questions may follow.

[powessy]

Spiritual possession is relatively instant as well. The longest part of the process would be the entity taking you over, which would only take a long time if your mind was actively awake.
For most people, their mind is in a constant state of slight hypnosis, completely or mostly unaware of what's around or within them, perfectly susceptible to all magick.
.

If I list my symptoms, can you tell me if it is within the realm of possibility of possible possession takeover? I recognize the fact that I am going crazy.

1. I am hearing voices.
2. I see distortions in the air like bubbles floating that are oscillating all around me. When I focus on them, I feel a strange sensation that is hard to put into context.
3. I hear a very strong ringing in my head that sounds like a sine wave.
4. I see very bright dots of different colors of light that seem to be connected to shadows.
5. I feel a very physical touch all around me.
6. I feel a oozing on my brain like someone cracked a egg inside my skull and a egg has covered my brain and is squeezing it? This has compounded over time. My brain feels divided.
7. I feel like my central place is being attacked? Like something/someone is trying to push itself in.
8. I have been to the hospital 5 times fearful of my life. When I agreed to not anger the 'voice' the pain/shaking stops and I am told it is a panic attack that I am experiencing from the doctors. Due to this, I have stopped going to medical facilities.
9. It gets extremely strong at night time.
10. I am have extremely strong vivid dreams.
11. At night time when I try to sleep, my ceiling looks like its not real? Hard for me to describe this and put it into words. It looks like its the air is oscillating and I am seeing a very heat like mirage looking effect that you would see in a desert.
12. My body randomly shakes and I have correlated this to the 'voice' wanting to tell me something and wanting my attention.

Only if it is possible of possession here, is there anything that you would recommend to break this connection? Thank you for your time.

Hello johnathanrs

You are an allowed soul, this is the reason you are experiencing this. I hear voices also 24/7 and experience every thing you are talking about above also. The main problem you are having is the shadow that has entered into you. The shadows are not from earth so they can not posses you only become themselves and yourself together. The shadow is the body you feel inside of you and is the egg feeling and sexual feelings you experience. The sexual feelings I know you also experience, but did not include in the above, is to find your mind only as they carry many other souls within them also to protect themselves from other things trying to enter into them also. I speak to the shadows and I have the ability to help them, and I can remove this form you if you wish. I need you to tell it to find powessy he can help you, I have done this for so many others experiencing your problems.

As for schizophrenia it is linked at the point only that many of them are allowed souls. The problem is many of these people had some sort of underlying problem in their life that caused them to enter into their minds and this is when their problem started, and yours started. There was something done many years ago to help the allowed reenter into the reincarnation cycle and that is the voices you hear. These voices tell the soul how to become something again and their main duty is to insure you do not become yourself this was to be done later, long story. When a schizophrenic had these problems in their life the voices activated, telling the soul over and over again to not become itself, these words are done in the higher mind and not heard.

There is many parts to this that can get very hard for people to understand so I will leave it at this. If you want it removed I will help you but I only ask that you take some time and answer some questions.

When did you first experience sleep paralysis? When was the first time you got attacked, some time in the last 7 years you had something happen what was it if you do not mind sharing? Tell me about your voices, do you think of them as telepathy or do you only hear them in your mind. Do you ever hear voices during meditation if they allow it? How many voices do you hear, can you separate them?

The reason for the questions is to see if the shadow will move to me on it's own so try to think about your answers and we will talk more. If the shadow remains over the next few days you can tell me and I will remove it by other means.

Powessy

[johnathanrs]

How does one distinguish the difference between the two?

It's not always easy to distinguish. But I would say that 90-95% of the time there is an underlying metal illness that can explain the hallucinations, oppression and self-harm. The Catholic Chuch these days requires a psychological evaluation before even entertaining the possibility of possession. I think it's important that you rule out any mental health issue first. That implies the consultation with a trained professional.

You can find here some information on how Priests approach this:

http://knowledgenuts.com/2014/01/31/how ... l-illness/

Thank you. I do not speak in foreign tongues, and I do not feel like I possess superhuman strength, so I do fail the test.

[johnathanrs]

Finally, almost every single human on this planet is possessed. But not by demons; By their own negative emotions and thoughtforms. No emotional feeling you have comes from within you, except happiness. All other emotions come from outside stimuli, and are to be transmuted and shut out.

Hope this offered some guidance for further study on the matter.

Thank you for the advise.

[johnathanrs]

So if you are so sure that you are not a christian. Why do you think you are possessed?
That is like me being a vegan and at the same time thinking that I have food poisoning.

I don't believe I am possessed; I believe I am going crazy and would like to know if it is all in my head or if there is also a possibility of possession being akin to my crazyness because I cannot rule it out. In my heart, I do feel it is something foreign like a 'spirit', but I try to follow the scientific method and always find objective truths rather than acts of superstitious belief.

[johnathanrs]

Depersonalization disorder - periods of detachment from self or surrounding which may be experienced as "unreal" (lacking in control of or "outside of" self) while retaining awareness that this is only a feeling and not a reality.

I do experience this. A feeling of lacking of control of myself.

Schizotypal personality disorder (STPD) or schizotypal disorder is a mental disorder characterized by a need for social isolation, anxiety in social situations, odd behavior and thinking, and often unconventional beliefs. People with this disorder feel extreme discomfort with maintaining close relationships with people, so they avoid forming them. Peculiar speech mannerisms and odd modes of dress are also diagnostic signs of this disorder. In some cases, people with STPD may react oddly in conversations, not respond, or talk to themselves.[1] They frequently misinterpret situations as being strange or having unusual meaning for them; paranormal and superstitious beliefs are common. Such people frequently seek medical attention for anxiety or depression instead of their personality disorder.[2] Schizotypal personality disorder occurs in approximately 3% of the general population and is slightly more common in males.[3

People experiencing a psychotic episode in the context of depression may experience persecutory or self-blaming delusions or hallucinations, while people experiencing a psychotic episode in the context of mania may form grandiose delusions.

I talk to myself in my head. I do have paranormal and superstitious beliefs. After these bouts, I have been to the hospital multiples times, which can be attributed to anxiety. I do have self-blaming. I believe that I have sinned and brought this onto myself by dabbling in the paranormal. Thank you for the insight. However, I am aware of all of this myself. I find the concept of possession originally ludicrous, something to do on halloween around a camp fire to scare your friends. People who practiced magic or religious sacred acts were, to my previous beliefs, people who had too much time on their hands for the most part. I never ruled out the possibility of magic existing, just to me, magic is merely science that is ahead of its time. I felt that if their were any truth to the stories of days old magic, it would represent a 1% truth among a mountain of 99% lies.

My problem is I played around with 'summoning' before all of this happened, which is the premise that is causing all of my anxiety. If I hadn't done that, I could easily rule this as all being in my head. I keep telling myself that I am just going crazy and should stick to conventional wisdom, but would that not be a lie? Dishonesty on my part?

When I am fed definitions such as what you present, I feel they are just modern scientific answers by professionals who reject the supernatural phenomenon of what they do not fully understand yet. They are correct, but it does not mean they represent all realms of possibilities that represents the complexity of the brain. One can construe this as ego on my part, I realize. One of my bachelor degrees was social science where I studied alot about psychology. To me, the field is in the dark ages, no different then the medical field was in the 1700's. I feel within time, their will be leap and bounds within the scientific research, but following history trends, one basic example, their have always been beliefs that represented modern time 'facts' such as the planet is flat, the universe revolves around the sun, exc... only to be disproved by hero's of enlightenment who bring about change for the better of all humanity. "Scientiests" in the past never never believed in the existence of the atom, but it does not mean that the atom didn't exist then. Because of humans limited understanding, I cannot rule out the possibility of this being all in my head, although I welcome it.

Am I schizophrenic? No question about it based on what we label as being schizophrenia. Is the very phenomenon of schizophrenia itself something that we as a species no not fully understand yet? That is what I am trying to find out. I have already passed the threshold of labeling myself as crazy thanks to the posts above. I am simply looking for a cure to my madness. I don't care if it comes in the form of re-training my brain or turning to the religious path because I am in need of salvation. I am open-minded to all possibilities.